March 23, 2005
Save Disney Defeated!

On March 17, Stanley Gold and Roy Disney ran an opinion piece in the Los Angeles Times that accused Disney's board of being less than thorough in its search for a replacement for Michael Eisner. In their piece, Gold and Disney raised several points, namely that Disney's board:

1) Did not engage in a wide search for a new CEO for the company,

2) Allowed Michael Eisner to sit in on significant portions of candidate interviews, skewing their outcome,

3) Did not respond in a prompt and professional manner to simple requests from the lead outside candidate for the position, and

4) Appear to have intended to just hire Robert Iger all along.

At first blush, this appeared to be the final nail in the coffin for Disney's board. However, on May 23, a short six days later, Disney board members Judith Estrin and Robert Matschullat had their side of the story published in the Times, and the results were devastating.

Estrin and Matschullat's piece not only went to the trouble of repeating the same evasive claims that the board had put forward before Save Disney's opinion piece was published, but they also added new ones. And, putting the icing on the cake, they went a step further, saying that Gold and Disney were "mean."

It was all just too much for the Save Disney team. "How can we even go on," said Roy Disney after reading the piece. "They said I was mean and, well, I guess that pretty much makes everything I've ever said about the board untrue, doesn't it?"

"Roy's right," added Stanley Gold. "I mean, if Hitler said that Disney's board was just a bunch of puppets for Michael Eisner then it couldn't possibly be true because Hitler was a bad, bad man. It's just a logical truth. If Disney's board thinks we're mean, then we must be wrong about everything."

With that, Gold and Disney announced that they were closing up shop and were going to enter a monastery in Tibet to atone for their evil ways.

In completely unrelated news, Disneyland has begun unveiling new decorations for the park's 50th anniversary. A number of iconic park elements have been given gold trim, and a new Disney museum will soon be opening on Main Street U.S.A.. Disneyland management says that, appearances aside, the park's sudden massive promotion of gold and Disney has nothing to do with company politics.